My Oath

Today I officially received notification that I pass my Ph.D. in Philosophy specializing in Metaphysical Parapsychology.

My Oath

I swear by the Infinite Mind of the Universe, that is God within and about me, and by all gods and goddesses and powers of good that be, all these things taking witness, that, according to my God-given ability and judgment, I will in every way keep this, My Oath and Covenant-

I Dedicate above all else in my life to lift others from lack of wholeness in their minds, bodies, and souls.

I will abstain from every voluntary act of injustice and corruption in the practice of my metaphysical art.

I swear that I will not take advantage of those who place their trust in me as their Metaphysical Doctor-nor take advantage of them Due to their weakness in mind, body, or spirit-but rather rid them of their weakness, which is my chosen profession.

I will be compassionate to those who are broken of spirit, but will not overindulge them in sympathy to keep them weak.  Rather, I will teach them of the Strength and Power they have within themselves to resurrect their spirit, and thus their lives.

I will Discourage those who find comfort in glorifying me, glorifying instead the Power within them that has made them whole and encourage them to say to all that the Power is within them to do likewise.

I share the knowledge of the Power within by my metaphysical art.  "I am a practitioner of self-Discover" - and seek not my own personal glory, but rather to glorify others within themselves.

I will hold in confidence the guarded secrets of those who bare their souls to me in private.  I will never make their words public, except in passing, to teach others by way of their experiences, but without identifying them in any way - or in consultation with my colleagues in Discussing their good, knowing that my colleagues likewise honor this sacred trust.

I shall nourish a sense of humor within myself that, as part of my healing, I may bring a sense of lightness to the hearts of others-that we may laugh together at the foolishness of the mortal mind to better contrast and thus glorify the Immortal Mind within us all.

I swear to set aside personal pettiness and personal pride in my associations with my colleagues - that it may never take precedent over the time we have on this earth to be of service to others through our common metaphysical practices.

I swear that if the Spirit and Intelligence of Universal Life grants me substance to provide me with the means to pursue this, my chosen profession, to the Spirit of Life I swear that I shall thank it every day of my life that I have been able to be of service to others through my art-knowing well, within myself, that there is no greater way that I could be living my life.

While I keep this Oath inviolate and unbroken, may it be granted to me to enjoy life and my metaphysical art, forever honored by men-not for my personal recognition, but rather that I have caused them to recognize the Power within themselves.

But should I, by transgression, violate this Oath, mine be the reverse.

I Swear This Oath In My Heart Where The Intelligence Of The Universe, Which Is My God, Forever Knows My Innermost Thoughts-And So It Is!

9/24/2010        Rev. Carla Goddard, Ph.D.

Death, Disembowelment, and Rebirth - Did I sign up for this?

It seems to be the way.  When an energy signature arises, you learn to identify it, acknowledge it, and honor it.  Life goes on.  At times, reflecting back upon the feelings, the sensations, the thoughts, and the sounds.  Then it happens again.  The difference being that this time you recognize the energy signature.  You know the sensation, the thoughts, the sounds, and the feelings that accompany it.

For the first time, I watched an accident from start to finish.  I got to stand back and experience all that there is in watching frame by frame until it was completed with a stepping from the shores of the physical planes to cross the river into another plane.  An experience that shook every fiber of my being to its core as a death transpired and a birth occurred.  I have been blessed in life to be a part of births, not only my own children, but babies born to others.  It is truly a wonder of nature to experience.  I have also been blessed in life to be a part of deaths.  To be there as the physical heart stops its cadence; yet, still hear the drum beat.  To stand in the silence as a human life departs is also truly a wonder of nature to experience.

To watch it frame by frame is something that is quite extraordinary.  At 12:20 pm today an elder grandmother took her last breath.  She was a woman that spread her love and inspiring message to any who shared her journey whether it was for a moment or a lifetime with an unconditional love rarely seen.  At 1:11 pm a friend came to me to ease her pain and for the words to tell a loved one it was okay to let go.

Breathing inward life, exhaling outward death always cycles around in a birth of a new creation.  I was reminded this morning that there are times when we do what we must because it is right not because it is comfortable.  There are times when what must be done is a battle, there are times that what must be done tears at your heart and you grieve for those you walk with and for yourself, and there will be times when you ask yourself “did I really sign up for this?”.  It is all part of this thing we call the journey of life. 

I was also reminded this morning that things that I “get” to participate in, the plays I “get” to participate in, and the pictures I “get” to do will bring great rewards and even deeper love and passion.   

This Super Harvest Moon has disemboweled the woman that existed ... what will emerge in the rebirth is the joy of discovery.  One of the many unspoken gifts.  Again, I ask "did I sign up for this?"  Yes, yes I did.

Finding Authentic Self Through the Death of Another

My awareness of life as a human is each and every one has their own mission or mandate.  What does this really mean?  Each has their own spiritual path or journey to follow, their own dream and desire, their own symbols and way of living, and their own experiences.  This journey we call life is personal.  It is personalized by the choices made, the lessons learned and the forks in the road taken.  The mandate is learning to live life in the most fulfilling and richest way possible while living our own ethics and taking responsibility for our choices.  It sounds simple enough.

Simple is not always easy.  As humans we complicate everything in life.  Every decision weighed and measured, every fork in the road contemplated, and every thought questioned.  The innate desire within is to know the answer to the questions deep inside.  What does ‘all’ this mean?  What is the purpose?  It is challenging to step into a flow where we seek the simple and accept it unconditionally.

I had an encounter that played into this trap of questioning, complicating, and weighing every thought, decision and action.  A quote by Agni Eickermann comes to mind in reflection, “Even if a problem is complex, the right answer is simple and clear."  Rumination, at the moment I did a lot of questioning and complicating

I sought out a path from Hawk, a Shaman mentor and friend.  His retort so simple in nature, the way so clear; yet, shadowed from view before spoken.  Hindsight can expose more truth than standing in the moment.

It was a day to be allocated to the sun’s rays connecting with the energies of the Earth.  Yet, at every turn something impeded my productivity.  Electrical tools denying their use; snubbing my aspiration.  The resonance of tires squealing capturing all my awareness.  The slight waft in the air stopping, frozen in a moment as a truck hurtled through a center island.  Metal soaring as sign posts were coerced from their planted spots deep in the Earth to aberrantly pierce the air.  Decisively and consciously inhaling deeply, it took heartbeats before the eyes would converge into reality.

An instinctual take over removing conscious thought.  The truck deployed from its frozen state.  Observing movement on the black asphalt; droplets of sweat forming across my landscape like jewels to reflect in the rays of light. Unable to tear my vision as a production was portrayed in slow motion, something binding my energy.  Every pulsation of my heart drumming out a strange and disturbing beat questioning self as a horrific scene formed.  A creative artist turning and twisting the metal in motion leaving an energy signature upon the Earth painted on a green foliage landscape.  No time, no space, a limitless void.  Desperate to return to a completely conscious state, unsure of wanting this experience, letting my eyes close to reset the vision.

Opening my lashes it was not a vision.  It was reality.  Instinctually grasping the phone to call 911 to do responsible action without engaging was the only thought.  Unable to shake the invariable shivers ensuing, far too many images racing and wanting to escape the unknown.

Returning to the sanctuary of my walled home in attempt to regain perspective and balance within.  What was the fear?  My fear?  Leaning back to close my eyes once more, the scene replaying over and over as though I was missing a piece; an essential piece of the playing out of the story.  Watching a form emerges with seemingly ease through the distorted columns of metal.  The drumming palpitating accentuates each step the figure took until the ice cold air sent goose bumps upon the tiny droplets of sweat.  Pulling myself from the visions as a searing gaze bore down upon me.  A man standing in front of me was violating my sanctuary.  The eyes holding a reflection of me, of my questions, my confusion was easily discernable.  Wild thoughts skid in and out; why was he here?  What did he want?  Why won’t he leave?  Panicked at the sight so real that was forcing me to engage what I was trying to escape.

Calling the one man who knew would make this man understand he had to leave.  Hawk.  Speak with your soul.  Think it.  He is as confused as you are.  Explain it to him.  It is your picture to do.  Something outside of self responding taking an active role and engage.

“What do you not understand?"

“What happened?"

“You were in an accident?"

“I was driving down the road.  Something is wrong."

Wanting to tell him bluntly – yeah something is wrong.  “Your dead."

“I can’t be dead, I am standing here.  You see me."

How do you answer that one?  Yes I can see him.  Yes I can hear him.  But he is dead, at least, I think he is. “Come let me show you."  Walking out to the end of the driveway without looking back to see if he was following.  A desperate haunting hunger permeates the energy flowing; the aroma unmistakable.   The hunger would be quenched.  It was unstoppable.  The drumming pervades the stench swirling.

He stood mesmerized at the bizarre grays and blacks depressed into the avocado foliage.  Flashing blue and reds pieced the tapestry scorching one thread at a time. 

“That one is my brother."  Just a simple statement of fact made.  My phone ringing breaks the secret innate language being shared.

“Mrs. Goddard, this is Trooper X.  Would it be possible for you to come to the scene to answer a few questions?"

“Of course."  Looking towards the man confused as to why he was still there.  “I have to walk down there."

“I’ll come."

Wondering if seeing himself in the truck will do better at explaining than I could?  Captivated in watching him move to where he moved.  Unable to see the man in the truck Blood red tears flowed down his cheek bones.  “I am not ready."

“Your not ready?  Ready for what?"

“To go."

“There is nothing I can do.  It is time, you have to go."

“It was an accident."

Thinking no shit it was an accident.  “Yes you were in an accident."

“No I mean it was an accident.  It wasn’t suppose to happen yet."

“But it did, now it is time for you to go."

He didn’t reply, I could feel his eyes upon me as the physical world drew me back.  A brother in grief, a trooper asking questions, and men in blue shirts doing their jobs as though a dead man was standing in the midst; it was the world of the physical.  He walked back to my side wanting to hear the exchange.

“Help them."

“Help who?"

“My brother and mother."

It was more of a begging plea than a command.  “Of course, but you have to go.  Go back in your body and make a deal or let go."

“Not yet."

What was he waiting for?  The trooper trying to obtain my attention bringing me back to the physical; would I go with the brother to notify the next of kin?

“Of course."  Speaking a soft prayer and petitioning the skies for strength, I went to the brother with compassion and empathy knowing deep within the darkness was felt by him.

Returning from the mother’s home wanting to collapse into a ball and cry my own tears for the immense pain and torment the mother had expressed; but knowing there was more to do.

It was time; time to quench the starvation.   The souls sharing secrets forming a bond to forever connect their souls.  Questions answered, confusion lifted.

“In case you’re wondering, my name is John."  For a few heartbeats the silent language shared more secrets and knowledge of one another.

“John it is time now."

“I know."

A slowing pulse shifted the drum matching the movement as slowly two figures walked down the black asphalt into a mist that had not existed before, disappearing before becoming a part of the canvas that was still in motion.

Gateways opened.  Veils parted.  A beckoning calling that must be answered.   Good byes shared.  Longings remaining.

“John…"  He paused and looked at back at me waiting.  Words seemed inadequate given the surroundings.

“I know."  He turned with me following.  I had been here before.  I had seen this landscape before.  This was not some unknown.  It was not something to be feared or questioned.  “C it is not your time yet."  There were no goodbyes.  There was no fanfare.  Silence.  A void.  Nothingness contained within everything.  Standing alone.  Feeling disturbed; yet I was the one that wanted answers.  I was the one who wanted to see, to know.  Now exposed with all the fears laid out, it did not feel as I had expected.
The heat witnessing the return of a single figure as it rolled up from the blacktop.  There was a moment when the single figure stood with one foot in the mist and one on the blacktop.  Within the drumming, breathe given and breathe taken, life given and death taken; a choice made with rewards given both in life and in this death.  Life suspended; a death experienced while a creation formed a birth.  An amazing circle of energy experienced as never before. 

When something touches your souls, it is then that we discover your authentic selves.  It is in discovering that authentic self that we discover your own truths.  As this is revealed in stepping between the worlds it is paramount that we pay attention acutely to the signatures that we encounter.  As this authentic self is revealed, discovered, and exposed it is ultimately up to the individual what choice they make; the choice is either to succumb to living an unexamined life or choose to discover what the hell is going on, engage in the energy flow, and grow from the experience.

The choice made, the divine language vibrations encountered, and the engagement made each step and thought shifting from the fears and boundaries as steps into the authentic self.  Being completely open and willing to make the engagement, the language and even the very heart beat sounds can be completely understood without words. Each person’s authentic path, their authentic self exists deep within our core.  Releasing the boundaries and limitations of old patterns and thought simple and very clear once the veil is crossed.  And when you return, even though the ‘picture’ is still not in focus, you know what you want and need suddenly.  You know what feeds you and exactly what can defeat you.  You know what is right, simply because it feels right.  You know what your life purpose is, even though you have no idea what it is.

Each lesson, each perception, and each situation may not be obvious.  The words that did not make sense, the encoded symbols and signs not understood are no longer a foreign language.  If you dare to take a step and engage, you earn your own sovereignty and walk a destined path.

To live your life on purpose; on purpose without the self-imposed boundaries and limitations has its difficulties.  Difficulties I cannot even begin to fathom words to describe. However, living your life on purpose in this manner, engaging when the picture is in front of you, has its rewards.  It feeds you and leaves you hungry for more.

Everyone is called.  Not everyone has the courage to answer the call.

Super Harvest Moon - 2012 and the Energy Ray Signatures

The 'Super' Harvest Moon

I was asked what the hype is, what does this 'super' harvest moon really mean besides the beautiful view.
The Harvest Moon traditionally is the time when the farmers begin to harvest their gifts from the garden.  It is that simple.  Metaphorically, this is the time of year when we begin to harvest our gifts or our burdens from the past year.  The old saying "you reap what you sow" is refering to the Harvest Moon.

There have been a variety of other names through different cultures for this September Full Moon such as Turtle Clan Moon, the barley moon, and the Singing Moon.  All metaphorically having their own tradition in each of these cultures.  When this full moon actually falls in the month of October rather than September it is referred to as the Hunter's moon.

The reference to the "Super Harvest Moon" astrologically is something that has not occured for over 20 years.  This is a rare event where the moon is in a position in the sky to create an illusion of being larger and brighter than usual all night long.  Last evening a couple of other rare events occured.  Jupiter is visible as a bright star next to the moon and if you had a decent set of binoculars you could catch glimpses of Uranus.  Normally the harvest moon and the autum equinox do not happen on the same day.  The autumn equinox is the event when the day and night are equal in length.  This gave the Harvest Moon a chance to glow in equal proportion to the the sun's rays.  There Moon actually was in full glow about six hours after the officially equinox.

Normally the Harvest Moon is a few days to a week before or after the equinox.  This has not happened since 1991 and it will not happen again until 2029.  This unique celestial show was spectacular to watch.
But what does it mean?

Autumn Equinox is also called Mabon in some traditions.  This is the time when landscape begins to change, and the marked shift between summer ending and autumn beginning.

It is a time when the astrological signs shift.  We come into Libra, the sign of balance and love of beautiful things.  It is a time when the flow of energy comes to rest and light and dark are in complete balance with one another.  As we prepare for energetic shifts in the coming months, which have been seen to be happening by many in preparation for this illusive 2012, this unique celestial event is another signature of what is happening around us.

My personal perception and experience yesterday and this morning is that with extra energy in the air it has been the perfect time to clean up life.  Clean up physically, emotionally and spiritually.  To re-evaluate and discard those things that are simply just cluttering the space.   Whether that space is your office or your emotions.  See what you are hoarding just to hoard and release them.  "When you let go and empty your hands, you are free to grasp the new". (Agni Eickermann)

If you are thinking, I can't believe I missed it last night.  The "Super Harvest Moon" will be just as spectacular this evening.  There are some that celebrated in their tradition last evening and then there are those who celebrate tonight.  If you are like me, I had a fire last night, this morning as the sun exchanged places, will have another tonight, and again tomorrow morning (I like to cover all the basis - besides loves fires).  So pause for a few minutes this evening and take a walk outside to gaze up at the moon's rays.

Get Me A Fire Extinguisher? Or Healing Anger and Rage

Have you ever felt so angry at a situation you just wanted to explode?  You want to hit something?  Hurt someone?  Feel out of control?  Anger and rage can cause more problems simply by the emotional outbursts that happen when the fire gets out of control.  So how do you put the fire out?  Simply put – how do you heal anger so you no longer feel the emotion?

We have all heard of the physical reactions of rage and anger from high blood pressure to back pain.  It has been shown that anger and rage can cause more physical reactions than originally thought from changing your metabolic rates to increasing the risks of cancer.   There are more reasons to heal from anger and range than the simple emotional discomfort it causes.

There are many techniques that can be utilized.  These are some of my favorites that have worked for me and countless others that I have been blessed to work with.  Remember it is important to find one that works for you.  There is no one answer or solution that fits for every person.  As a matter of fact, many find that different causes of anger require different techniques to heal from it.

With every technique it is vital to start with acknowledging that you have anger.  When you deny that you are angry it perpetuates even more physical and emotional problems.  You can’t find a solution to a problem you deny exists.  Say out loud “I am angry”, “I am pissed”, or any other statement that fits your personality.  Acknowledge the emotion.  Say it out loud.  When you say it out loud it releases some of the power the anger has over you.  It releases some of the energy from your chakra energy system.  Each time you release some of this energy it is cut in half.  Have you ever heard the old saying “share your sadness and it is cut in half”, same principle here.  The key here is not to vocally express towards another person, but rather to yourself.

Many times anger and rage create an adrenaline rush.   It is a physiological reaction.  If you find that this is your case, it is vital to express some of that adrenaline before trying to heal the anger.  There are as many ways to express the energy as there are people who have experienced anger.  For some it is physical exercise, punching a pillow, or blowing bubbles.  There are two specific techniques that I have found work for my own expression of anger. 

First, if it is truly just anger (there is a difference between anger and rage in level of intensity) I use a rubber band.  I put a rubber band (that is loose) around my wrist and when I feel the anger rising I snap the rubber band against my wrist by pulling it outwards.  This causes another type of physiological reaction in the body and counteracts the chemical reaction of the adrenaline flooding due to the anger.

If it is rage, I find breaking something works for that expression.  I collect coffee cups from yard sales and thrift stores (there was a time when I was struggling with rage where friends would bring me bags of mugs).  I take a few mugs outside I smash them against some rocks.  The sound and physical action helps to release the anger.  I am blessed in that I have not had to purchase any mugs for a few years, I do however, keep the broken mugs nestled in my rock garden as a visual reminder that I have released the anger.  It has taken the anger expression and transformed it into an eclectic expression of art.  Many have commented on the variety of colors and shapes in the garden – a gift unexpected.

Remember as you are working on expressing the anger, it has more than likely been pent up inside of you for some time.  Don’t rush the process.  Allow the anger to flow out.  It may completely drain your energy at first.  This is normal.  You are emptying your emotional “chalice” so that you can refill it with emotions of love and joy.

Having acknowledged the anger, accepted it as being valid, and begun to release the physical energy from it, now is time to begin the healing from it.  Many times by this point you may begin to feel like the situation has just disappeared.  The physical aspect of release is done, so you must have healed it – right?  Stopping at this point is only going to cause you to continue in the future to have to re live the anger over and over.  You released it – not healed it.

Sit down and write the situation out.  Give it a name.  Allow yourself for a moment to look at the situation and discover what really caused the anger.  What part of you felt threatened?  What part of you was fearful?  What part of you was hurt?  Can you see the other side of the anger?  What did the situation or problem give you?  Compassion?  Passion?  Strength?  Persistence?

When you look at the other side of the situation, many times you realize that it was not this dark cloud haunting you.  The amazing thing about a cloud is behind it there are always rays of light.  We just can’t always see them.  In turning a situation around (flipping it) you change the emotional attachment to the situation.  You change or shift the energy signature of the situation.

Now that you have a different perspective, have released the physical energy, and shifted the energy signature of the situation, the next part of healing from anger is to go out and express this new energy.  Find an expression that treats and nurtures you.  That says “I love you” to yourself.   This can be spending some time relaxed on a beach, taking a walk, or finding friends to share your love with.

The last part of healing anger is to extinguish the embers of the fire so that it does not continue to flare up.  Remember that your emotions are muscles as well.  Muscles need to be exercised in a balanced manner.  I was told many years ago, “You either need to have a really good belly laugh once a week or a really good cry”.  If you exercise your emotions, those embers won’t flare up as they do not have to have the energy to do so.  You have already expressed it by either laughing or crying. 

As you cultivate this new mindset of acknowledging, expressing, and healing from emotions rather than allowing them to become forest fires, it shifts your overall energy signature to a peaceful and loving energy.    Those who experience life with anger and rage always flaring up tend to have the perceptive of black and white or good and bad.  When you begin to cultivate this new mindset, you begin to realize that life is a choice.  You have the choice to feel and experience anger, to remain there, and to get lost within it.  It burns.  Or you have the choice to feel and experience love, to remain there, and to get lost within it. 

A New Horizon Exploration - The Tin Can

Normally around a full moon I am exhilarated.  It is the time when I feel centered and in harmony.  I feel empowered by everything.  Yesterday was a day when I did not want to do the pictures.  I wanted to go to my 'special place' and be alone.  Really to go and hide.   I saw a friend, one of those friends that tell it like it is - the best kind.  She said you don't look like your perky self.  I said 'gee thanks'.  I spoke with a mentor and shared my dis-harmony.    It was suggested I needed a new perspective.

I asked and it was given.  I accepted and now it is a responsibility to follow through.  There are times when doing the pictures can cause a great emotional upheavel within.  It was one of those times.  So outwardly, I did what was expected.  I did the pictures.  I can not tell you that it was an overjoyful experience; however, experience has shown me that it was a moment.  A moment that is unified with thousands of other moments.  I, sometimes, can only see my moments.

When you touch your solar plexus with the palm of your hand it should radiate with your whole energy being.  Your own power should simply be a reflection of your heartbeat within.  When it does not radiate and beat out a rhythmn your power is not flowing.  As I lay upon the grass this morning barely feeling a pulse, let alone a strong heartbeat, I closed my eyes and did as I was shown to wake up my energy.

In taking another simple moment to do the picture was shown, the previous moment slipped away.  I could see my moments and the moments of those around me.  Changes your perspective dramatically when you see more than your own moment.

It was shared with me afterwards that when I fight anything, especially my own self or the pictures, I give away my power.  When I stop fighting and struggling, the veil is lifted and the snow on my screen clears up.
When a warrior shows up at your doorstep, instead of doing battle or becoming the pitiful and seemingly defenseless victim, see the warrior as a worthy opponent.  Honor the warrior.  Become an ally of the warrior.  Many times we look at those who show up at our doorsteps as enemies when they are wearing the tapestries of a warrior.  We become defensive before even knowing what the purpose of their visit is.  We automatically assume that they must be negative in nature.  How would we know if we do not show them honor and invite them.  By appearance?

I read a reference in a book a long time ago (I can't find the reference again nor the book I read it in to give exact quote), in essence it described a human being as a tin can.  If you take a tin can and look at it as a whole tin can you can not deny that it is a tin can.  It is what it is.  When you look at the tin can in the sun you see how the rays reflect off the round outsides.  As you look within, it becomes dark.  There is no light reflected within as the rays can not reach it.

Each of us is like that tin can.  We see things because of the suns rays reflecting off the outside.  If there is no sun light to illuminate within we would see nothing.  Does that mean that the nothingness within is dark or does it mean that the insides don't exist because we can not see them.  Each of us is half light and reflect outwards sharing our reflections.  We are also half darkness.

When we look at the darkness, we see the boundaries of the light.  It is those boundaries that limit us.  They limit seeing other peoples moments.  They limit us as they create fear.  Fear of the unknown and what is unseen.  It is only because we are unfamiliar with the darkness that we fear it.  It is what it is.  Simply unfamiliar.

If I were to shine a flashlight within the tin can and illuminate it, the insides would be light and all revealed.  Once revealed it is no longer unknown.  Does that mean that when I turn the flashlight off and it returns to darkness that it is no longer familiar, no longer part of light?

Light is our wisdom and understanding within.  It is our knowing.  The darkness is simply our absence of light.  To understand the darkness, it is simply a matter of turning on and tuning into our wisdom and understanding within.  A simple process of shifting the focus.   In doing so what was once unfamiliar becomes familiar.   The heartbeat felt and shared once more.

So to answer the question asked of me:  Fear of being different.  That is the fear that dwells within the darkness.

Back to doing the pictures and the moments.  since then, a thousand moments have happened.  I am reminded of a statement made to me by another teacher, "When you want to know the truth, stop having an opinion about it."  Fear of being different - the truth is, fear is having an opinion.  Opinions limit us to lack and create boundaries far more rapid than nearly every other attribute.  "Courage is not the absence of fear, it is doing the pictures in spite of the fear".

It is what it is, time to 'do the pictures'.